(no subject)

[cast_iron_bitch]

Laurent stepped away from his library and the sleeping boy within it and went to the washroom, splashing cold water on his face. He felt at once too warm and chilled, and he stared at his reflection in the mirror. His eyes were too bright, and the color too high in his cheeks. He did not look calm, certainly not to one who knew him as well as Nicaise.

Breathing deeply, Laurent checked on the pallet of cushions once more and went to the kitchen to pour himself some water. His phone still lay where he had left it after ordering dinner. Laurent picked it up. For a moment, merely looking at Damen's name in his list of contacts calmed him.

It was ridiculous, of course. Damen would not care for this arrangement one bit, especially after that business with his own house guest. Still, Laurent was in tangles, and after a moment more he accessed his messaging system.

After a rough start, his fingers acclimated to the touchscreen keys, and Laurent began a message.

Why did your people build Ios on the sea?

Laurent sent the note, then frowned.

A sentry city would have done just as well, leaving you to safeguard your capital in the inland mountains.

Comments

[cast_iron_bitch]

Laurent exhaled. He would prefer Nicaise to eat his food. He would prefer that he never have harmed himself at all, nor been killed at home. He would prefer a great many things that could not be, and Laurent could find no more reason to prevaricate.

At home, it might have been a game, one genuinely amusing to Laurent, but meant to sharpen Nicaise's already quick mind. Here, Laurent was blunt. 'It was not an order, and he is not a dog. He is a King, Nicaise, or was, before this place stripped him of his title.'

Laurent looked from Nicaise to Damen. 'This is Damianos.'

[princekiller]

And another surprise still.

Damen blinked, then stared at Laurent for a moment. He had not expected Laurent to be so honest. Based upon both memory and what he knew now of Laurent's mind, he had assumed that Laurent found some bit of enjoyment in the child's sharp tongue and easy dismissal of Damen. Either his patience had merely worn thin or his warmth toward Damen had grown to such an extent as some comments said at his expense were not to be tolerated.

'And neither of us are kings here,' he added after a moment. 'At least not in title or power. Have you been here long?' he asked then, the question posed toward Nicaise though it's Laurent whom Damen looks to.

[handfulofsapphires]

Nicaise stared at Laurent. Of every shock and surprise this place had thrown at him, this one, that was not even a product of Darrow, was the biggest. He wanted to be as blunt as Laurent, to ask why the enemy Prince who had killed his brother was here to eat pheasant with them, was a friend, an equal.

Prince-killer was on the tip of Nicaise's tongue, he wanted to spit in the Akielon's face and make it count this time. But he thought of the bed of cushions Laurent had made him. Laurent, who looked shaken for some reason. The Laurent Nicaise knew back home was neither shakable nor so forgiving. Would the Laurent Nicaise knew before have invited him to his home?

Everything here was...wrong. Nicaise felt wrong. Displaced.

Nicaise looked away from Laurent and to his plate of food, overwhelmed. He hardly registered Damianos' question, not that he would have answered it either way.

[cast_iron_bitch]

It was one shock among many, and not one Laurent savored delivering, but it was done. He watched Nicaise and weighed his options. He didn't mean to let the boy suffer again, but how much weight could the assurance hold? He had left Nicaise to his death - what reason could he have to trust him?

Laurent glanced at Damen, but he would find no advice there, not because of any failings but because there was none. There was no good path here. All Laurent could do was to attempt to offer hope.

'You've been here a handful of days. Acclimation will come in time,' he said. 'You know what it is to survive, Nicaise - I am asking you to do it again. I will be a better friend to you this time.'

[princekiller]

The shock was clear upon the boy's face as he turned his attention back to Laurent and, in an instant, Damen felt what remained of his ire dissipate. For there was confusion in the boy's face too, and maybe something like betrayal. Damen knew exactly how he was seen in Vere, knew it was not without good reason. Surely, if history had played out differently, a prince who had done what he had would be equally reviled in Akielos. Damen could not fault the boy his reaction.

But he would not offer his friendship, at least not yet. If only in part because he knew Nicaise would not accept it.

The whole conversation felt one he should have no part in and Damen took a half a step back, his eyes darting to Laurent before he spoke. 'Do you wish me to leave you? It was not my intention to interrupt.'

[handfulofsapphires]

Nicaise let Laurent's words sit and ruminate. It was true, he had learned how to survive at a young age. Anyone born into poverty must. And he had learned a new sort of survival at ten when he came to the Palace. He had missed his family so intensely at first he would cry himself to sleep. He did not like the ways the Regent would try to comfort him, and he soon learned that the Palace wasn't a place where you were allowed to be vulnerable. After the first few weeks he hadn't once let himself cry again.

He wouldn't let it happen now, not here. He had already shown enough weakness by taking a piece of glass to his wrists in a failed attempt at leaving this place.

He didn't know what sort of friend Laurent could be, or what that even meant, but he did not want to be fragile. He would not.

Nicaise took one breath, two, and carefully picked his utensils up to eat. "I'm fine, but his ugly face is ruining my appetite," Nicaise said, turning his nose up at the Akielon.

[cast_iron_bitch]

'A simple remedy then would be not to look at him,' said Laurent mildly, draining the last of his water. Nicaise was eating - under the circumstances it might be the best that he could hope for, and Laurent pushed back his chair.

'Perhaps you and I could speak alone,' he said to Damen, indicating a corner of the living room. 'Nicaise, eat. When you are finished with that you may have the chocolate.'

[princekiller]

His sympathy for the boy wavered some in that moment, eyes narrowing before Laurent's words caught his attention.

He stepped away then with a nod, quietly heading to the opposite corner of the room though he kept Nicaise within eyesight. There was no telling where next the child might find a stabbing implement nor how far or how accurately he might be able to throw.

'Were you not going to tell me?' he asked once they were several feet away, though he kept his voice low. 'Or was it be a discovery for tomorrow?'

[cast_iron_bitch]

It seemed they had similar ideas, for Laurent kept Nicaise in his vision also, though surely for different reasons. At Damen's question, laurent looked up. 'Is that truly your first concern?' he asked. Nicaise had been in his custody for no more than hours. Laurent had only just secured him a meal, but not clothes, not a bed. There was so much left to do.

'Of course I intended to tell you.' Laurent took a careful breath through his nose. 'I assume then that your reaction to his presence is not favorable.'

[princekiller]

Once again, Laurent was being careful with his words. Though hardly uncharacteristic, his care this evening was in a far different manner than Damen had seen in some months. He was controlled, almost guarded, in a way that had become rare.

And that alone was enough to still his temper.

'No one is brought here by choice,' he said instead, keeping his voice carefully calm. 'And as he is your countryman, it would be hypocritical of me to be upset you've taken him in. If I am at all unfavorable, it is to the child's inherent demeanor, not his mere presence here.'

[cast_iron_bitch]

Laurent listened with his back held very straight. Despite what he knew of Damen and Nicaise, or rather, because of what he knew, Laurent couldn't yet predict if there was to be a fight, but he softened somewhat as Damen did.

'He is more than my countryman,' said Laurent quietly. 'We are kin in ways I have not disclosed, at least not to you in this version of the world. I don't wish to be secretive,' Laurent added by way of apology, 'But he is alive again. I owe it to him to ensure he stays that way, Damen. And I like him.'

Laurent's gaze flickered back to the table. 'Though I cannot blame you if you do not.'

[princekiller]

And still, Laurent was hiding something. Unlike so many times before, it didn't feel malicious this time. Rather that he was revealing a glimpse at something he might share in time even if that time was not now. Indeed, his words seemed to imply that he'd at least shared it with the other version of Damen, the one who truly had his heart.

'I have yet to understand why,' Damen remarked, following Laurent's gaze over to the boy as he ate the food Laurent had provided.

He sighed then, frown still curving his lips. 'Is he to stay with you long?'

[cast_iron_bitch]

Laurent felt the urge to straighten again, but this time he ignored it. Not even the most excellent posture was likely to help him weather this storm. 'They named me his legal guardian,' he said, then, 'If they had not, I would have petitioned for it. He can't go back to the children's home, Damen. I know you believe him full of artifice, and he is, but those cuts on his wrists were made with a singular purpose, and it was not attention.'

[princekiller]

The ways of this world were still strange to Damen, but Laurent had taken to them easily, adapting and growing into this strange culture and stranger laws in a manner that hardly seemed fathomable. The fact that, in only a matter of days, Laurent had positioned himself as this boy's guardian was hardly surprising.

And yet still Damen felt his mouth fall open.

'So, he's to stay here indefinitely,' he said, the banking fire under his skin sparking anew. 'Where? In your room? Might I remind you how livid you were over Erasmus's presence within my rooms? And that was a matter of weeks.'

[cast_iron_bitch]

'In my study,' answered Laurent, almost grateful for the sudden heat in Damen's eyes. Rage could make one so volatile, yet in this instance Laurent felt strengthened by it, held up where his own nerves were slowly failing him as the day's trials marched on.

'And Erasmus is a man, and your sexual ideal, trained from birth to please you. It is not the same. You turned him out - he is now making his own life for the first time. If I turn this boy out, his only recourse is the children's home, and they did a piss poor job of looking after him. Will you have me send him back?'

Laurent lifted his chin. His voice remained soft, but it was laser sharp. 'Look at his wrists, Damen.'

[princekiller]

Damen did not need to look at the boy's wrists, nor did he need to argue. Yes, the situation was different, that he could acknowledge. But just as Laurent had been uncomfortable stepping foot in his dwelling while Erasmus had been sharing with him, so would Damen feel uncomfortable sharing a space with a boy who so vehemently despised him.

'Do not believe for a second the boy at that table would not eat Erasmus alive if given opportunity. He may be several years younger, but he was not raised the same.' It did not make Nicaise any less of a child, but there was an innocence to Erasmus, despite his training, that Damen felt ought not be ignored.

He forced himself to quiet, to take a breath. He would not react to Laurent's calm with anger, particularly as his worries for the boy were not entirely unjustified.

'Am I to be pleased by this?' he managed after a moment. 'You have essentially adopted a child, your uncle's pet. And I know you feel responsible for him, Laurent, but do you have any idea of what you're doing? Do you think he'll hate you any less here than he did there?'

[cast_iron_bitch]

'On the contrary,' said Laurent, 'He was not raised at all.' He looked away then, studying the texture of the wall beyond Damen's shoulder while he gathered his thoughts. He was very good at pretending he knew what to do. Oftentimes, it was true enough, and when it wasn't Laurent was excellent at feigning control, but the downside was that he was often expected to simply, correctly handle a situation that was completely out of his depth.

'If he hates me,' he said, 'Then I deserve it, but I don't believe he does. He stood before the most powerful man in Vere and pleaded for me, and he lost his head because of it.' Laurent paused, looking back at Damen.

'I know it cannot make you happy. I am sorry for it, for making you happy is one of few pleasures in my life.' He straightened. 'I will accept whatever sanctions you wish to place on our relationship because of it.'

[princekiller]

Even now, Damen wanted to know how Laurent knew that to be true. He had not been witness to Nicaise's death and knowing what little of the Regent as he did, Damen would just as easily assume that Nicaise was killed solely to manipulate his nephew into believing whatever he pleased. Laurent was not easily duped, that much was true; both he and the Regent had minds Damen could scarcely understand or keep up with.

There was still a rawness to Laurent's words, however. A vulnerability Damen understood Laurent still anxious to reveal.

'Sanctions,' he replied, brow furrowed. 'You mean such as the ones you placed when I was housing Erasmus? I'll admit, his presence within your dwelling will make me less eager to spend time with you here if only because I fear both for the state of my thighs as well as the durability of your cutlery.' He paused then, still watching Laurent carefully, something low in his stomach twisting uncomfortably. 'Are you expecting an ultimatum?'

[cast_iron_bitch]

Laurent lowered his eyes. 'I don't know,' he admitted. 'This is the only romantic relationship I have ever navigated. But I know I cannot give him up to that children's home.'

He had the urge to wrap his arms around himself, a thought that Laurent canceled, for Damen was right. He had for all intents and purposes adopted a child. He had Nicaise to think of, who still sat alone and eating, absorbing the fact that he shared a room with one of Vere's most hated enemies. He must appear strong, even as something within him twisted and ached at the turmoil in Damen's expression. 'He won't be as he was at home. Not forever.'

[princekiller]

For as strange as it seemed, Laurent appeared truly lost in that moment. Helpless in a way Damen had never before seen. His frown deepened as he quelled the urge to reach for Laurent's hand, all too aware of the boy in just the other room who still saw him as a vile enemy.

'That is nothing you can promise,' he said, his voice quieter once more. 'Nor should you. But I will not make you choose between him or me - I just ask that you consider the commitment you're making. Who's to say he won't bring another blade to his wrists? How are you to prevent that?'

[cast_iron_bitch]

Again came the urge to hold himself, and again Laurent quashed it, even as he forced himself to admit for a second time, 'I don't know.' Still, he felt a stirring of hope. Damen's concerns were not truly of bodily harm to himself. They were concern for Laurent's ability to handle Nicaise, which was concern for Nicaise himself, however contemptible he found Damen.

'I have much to learn in a very short time,' said Laurent. 'But he is not the only person in this room to be cast into such darkness at a tender age. I believe I understand him. And I must try.'

[princekiller]

The longer they spoke, the smaller Laurent seemed to become. Though he was still standing, something in his stature had weakened, had quieted, and Damen felt a great weight of guilt drop in his stomach. For he knew exactly of the darkness Laurent referred to. After all, it had been Damen who plunged him into it.

Pulling in a slow breath, Damen took a step back.

'Then I will not impede,' he said. 'But, child or otherwise, if he makes a move to harm you, he will have me to answer to.'

[cast_iron_bitch]

Whatever Laurent had expected of this moment, whatever he had hoped, it was nothing so great as what he actually received, and Laurent took his first free breath in long moments.

'And I pledge you the same,' he answered. Nicaise could not be collected enough yet to have designs on any of them, but he wouldn't tolerate violence against Damen. 'Thank you, Damen.'

[princekiller]

Laurent stood a little straighter then, his shoulders back as he met Damen's gaze.

Not so very long ago at all, Damen would have doubted Laurent's sincerity, would have assumed Laurent's allegiance to this boy would easily supersede whatever he might feel for Damen. But Laurent's words felt nothing short of a vow and all too clearly he could hear Laurent's voice from months ago in the back of his mind, a voice nearly begging Damen to trust him.

And so he would.

'I should still leave,' he decided, quieter once again as he glanced toward the other room. 'I don't believe my presence here is making anything easier for either of you.'

[cast_iron_bitch]

'For him, surely not,' agreed Laurent, allowing himself the simple pleasure of taking in Damen's profile when he looked away. It was a small thing, yet after such a volatile day, the sturdy line of Damen's jaw was refreshing to Laurent's spirits.

'Still, I am glad for your presence, brief though it must be today. Nicaise,' Laurent continued in a louder voice. 'Our guest is taking his leave.'